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1904 hrs
- I'm not in a very good mood today. I had sore throat since last nite. Followed by mild fever. I can't eat anyhing, I don't have mood to eat and I really don't have mood for anything. Pop some pills and slept around 5am this morning. Woke up around 11am and get ready for CUS meeting
- During CUS meeting, I tried to calm myself down and not to talk too much. But there are few times I felt like I wanna just... snap! at everybody. But, thank God I didn't.
- I went to Bakti's cafe to eat something. At this point, I was ssssooo damn hungry, I have to forced myself to eat something. When I wanna pay, I realized I dun have enuff $$$. WTH... so I borrowed from my fren.
- I went to the post office to settle something. But end up didn't sttle it cos the Q was long and I can't wait (hilang sabar sudah...)
- I went to the library. Don't know what to do. I went down to pc lab and sat there for hours. HOURS.
- What did I do?
- Online, chat, check FB trillion times, chat, read blogs, read news, read journals, check FB, stalk someone...
- What a waste of time... But I can't think of anything to do. i still have four journals to analise before this Wednesday but I really, really don't have mood and strenght to through all those now.
- I wanted to pray. But, why can't I?
- And why is my post numbered? Look stupid lehhh...
- I wanna eat. But I don't have mood to eat.
- I wanna call mum, but I don't wanna burden her with all my probs.
- I texted my use-to-be-bestfriend but I guess, we're all have move on, right?
- I need someone to talk to. Someone not from USM. Someone not in my life right now. I need someone new, fresh and older. Someone who can listen very very well and understand. Someone not from my past either. Someone ... out there.
- Someone called God?
- If I talke to Him, will I listen to His answer? No, CAN I listen if He answered?
- Clearly... I'm messed up again. I think I need more pills to calm me down and to make me sleep.
- If possible, forever....
A.M.E.N
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